Yesterday I followed the advice of my new Executive Function coach to map out my schedule, hour by hour, each day. I wrote down my Monday, starting with waking up at 6:00, even leaving myself leeway to not get out of bed until the coffee maker went off at 6:30.
I finally woke up at 8:00, the coffee was long brewed and getting cold. So already, I was behind schedule. I simply can’t wake up. I don’t know what my problem is but I have one theory.
I have incredibly dramatic dreams with lots of emotion. Sometimes I’m anxious and there’s a lot of furniture involved, i.e. moving from one place to another. Or, there’s a flight involved and I’m going to miss it. Especially when I have so much furniture to move first.
Sometimes I’m not going to graduate college. This is a universal anxiety dream, but for me, it’s very real. Senior year of college I took a blow off course in Wines at the hotel school. I failed. I was going to be short 2 credits.
I passed biology, psychology, statistics and expository writing. But I failed wines. Ironic, huh?
Ended up cranking out an independent study project with a professor. I don’t remember what it was, but it was hard. Harder, one would think, then a class on wines.
Egads, where did I go? Oh yeah, so I have these amazing dreams. Sometimes I’m in love. Sorry honey. So when my alarm goes off, I’m still in this emotionally charged dream state feeling all these things that I never feel in real life. Why would I wake up?
I told my coach that I’m most creative and productive in the morning. How do I reconcile these things? If I can’t wake up, I can’t take advantage of those creative minutes in the morning to get work done.
Sigh. How do you all do it? Get up early, work out in the morning, get to your jobs…I just can’t. Waking up is the worst part of my day. I suppose though, I have nowhere to go but up as the day progresses. It’s hard on the self-esteem though, waking up knowing you already haven’t accomplished as much as you should during the day. People always say there’s not enough time in the day. As far as I’m concerned, there’s way too much.
Aw Gee. Thanks Kristin. You get me.
Thanks Anne! I love that idea. Moving a chair at 6:35 a.m. lol!
❤️ Ahh! This post took me right back to a day of being with you in college! (And the Wines class trauma.😂) Seriously, I swear I felt like we were there… moving furniture… or moving from place to place… or just talking about moving something from place to place, haha. Maybe we like the adrenaline rush thought of something new each day – even though we secretly crave routine – hmm, perhaps relocating a chair each morning at 6:35am will satisfy that urge? (And keep your other half looking for the damn chair!) ❤️ …Nice to be able to spend time with you again via your blog!
Waking up is generally the worst part of my day as well…clearly that is only a minute detail of your thought-provoking stream of consciousness, but damn, you have managed to capture all of the mental battles of the morning and the daily thereafter.