Hungover? Nah. Too much sugar.

I used to have screaming migraines in the morning when I woke up after a night of drinking. Did I stop? No. I just got into the routine of taking Imitrex, migraine medicine, before I went to sleep and prayed to my non-existent god that I wouldn’t wake up with a headache. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t. So now that I’m not drinking, when I wake up with a headache I’m really pissed off. Like today. I woke up with a headache because I ate too much sugar last night. I mean, really? I can’t drink, and now I can’t eat sugar? Or, at least I can’t binge on sugar? Fuck that. I can’t stop consuming everything that I’m addicted to. Imitrex, here I come.

After three days of blogging, I’ve recognized my pattern. (This is what comes of a daily writing practice people. I’ve never actually experienced this before because I’ve never developed a writing practice. Because, well, procrastination/avoidance,but I digress.) I am writing about my daily life in recovery, and basically, it’s the same thing I would have written prior to recovery, i.e. when I was drinking like a fish daily. Most things in my life have not changed. I still have ups and downs. I still have headaches, I still have trouble getting things done, and I still sometimes get irritated with things.  BUT, my headaches aren’t nearly as debilitating. In general, I feel pretty good, my skin looks better and in general, I feel a shift towards something meaningful. I feel like I have a future, and I have hope.

Even if it doesn’t feel like it’s worth it or that things can change, it is and they will. It takes time.